Nothingville in Dreams (Interlude)

forget not the pain, the shame
though your memory denies
the blood remembers
the place recalls you to return
the brain aneurysm

smash the mandibles 'til they go past one another
weighed down by unwanted burden

all these creations just to cope
all these suicides committed by hope
no longer I could tell who died this time
though I do wish to know
for living and for peace

1. Obsidian Mirror

she lies in these dark and still waters
preserved in memory so bitter
of the years of fruitless labour
against the ebb and flows of unlife

she stares at her blank features artless
reflected in the tarnished mirror
pained remembrance of winged hours
flown out the window, never to return

death is certain for every that breathed
yest this life is no longer felt real

unborn child of dreams
conception nipped in the bud
our Mayborne is stillborn
her cradle is our tomb

she lies still in this frozen image
of a time most hurtful to be remembered
her stony figure disappearing soon
beneath the waves of November monsoon

the black vicar begins his poison sermon

for all those gathered here
from each corner of the consciousness
regardless of professed dominion
sinners international

there is yet love lingering here
however demented, however mangled

such a burden is this life to live
lowly the markers are laid in this chapter
too wounded you have been for so long
far too long you have been living on

for something you were no longer sure what it was
for some dream no longer felt to be yours
for a life no longer seemed to be of any worth
not even for a lie of any resemblance to a truth

the far shores come to our feet
as we bid farewell to our wrecked ship
we bury underneath mock prayers
and blasphemous tributes

she shall remain our poisoned stone
as each of us set off again to our corners
and when the ends of the earth meet again
we shall convene here at her beckoning

because there is yet hatred flowering here
much wounding in the heart, yet so dear

slowly we descend into the obsidian mirror
the shards of which lacerate our souls
the hue of which stained the whites of our eyes
into her bosom, deep into slumber like death

that we all gladly welcome in respite from the world

2. Hydrogen Lakes

the stars they beckoned to their sea
uncharted dark waters, imperceptible dark matter
pierced only by the lights of the loneliest
that faked adventurous stories of faraway voyages
if only for company of a child at night
staring at her long put down fantasies beside her
of marooned ships floundering in decay and paper
dragon-shaped and winged
she clutched at invisible meshes that kept it all together
as she flitted from one known dimension to a new one just discovered
cat-eyed and wild-hearted
yet to be announced at any hall
though not that it mattered at all

3. Bogged

I tremble before the vast emptiness
that terrifying expanse
within one's own soul to be found,
to be made aware of
after the death

unsure steps arranged
dipping slowly in the tarny waters

twilight years defined
I shudder at each thought going inward
threatening a collapse

looming imminent
emptying the skull
as some form of quiet madness

memories fade into forgetfulness
reasoning dulled by constant suppression
courage lulled by false sense of security
as ideas checked for correctness

hung heavily upon the shoulders
less and less willing the body bears
ashes of hope

the coldness of steel much welcomed
to alleviate the numbness
to cut through the stillness
as one shivers
as one steps closer to the edge
under a black hole sun
in a camera obscura

4. Dead Marshes

so precious and so plain
were the dreams once mine

and now there they lie
exposed on the dry riverbed
red underneath broken black
fervently disintegrating under the sun

in fragments, having shattered
parasitically latching on living flesh of memory
sometimes fondly nursed to reconciliation
most times festered like cancer

that canker that wounds the hearts of mothers

so tenacious, and so maimed
were the will to live

jarred inside formaldelhyde piety

so twisted and so monstrous
were the will to death

5. Methane Flame

scatter me to the stars
even if it was just a lowly dream
never deserved of this humble existence

light my hopes and dreams on fire
to fraily survive through the night endless
never enough to amount to anything worthwhile

it tingles, the sensations of anticipation
for an end of all ends for one nameless soul
leaving behind pure desires undisclosed

our names unregistered and forgotten
in our moment of ecstasy
blending into the shadows cut by lightless mercy

my lifeblood shall lease you unlife nondesirable
necessary evil committed by an innocent
heaviest sin on blameless lost ones

shadows lengthened to reach back to the past unchanged
mourned enough, even he shall disappear yet remained here
standing sentinel over grief like dusk before night

6. The Grim

whereto shall we now go
repentless, yet what was it
that we died for, killed ourselves for
no longer could we remember
nowhere is left for us to go
though none would willingly wish-
no, words were not enough
cut short of actually spoken
as if forbidden, out of innate fear
because it is inherently cut clear

7. Blue Lids

cover us all with the shroud of night
that serene quiet tinted black

sorry we are not for leaving things undone
at this point in time, the profane no longer holds
in the face of our untimely degradation

sorry we are for living far too long
far too long than we were welcomed

let us retreat into the darkness where we came from
retrace our steps along the unlighted path
put back in place the weighted slab

where we shall sleep indefinite
in this severe quiet benighted heart

gradually our words cease to come out
as our minds suffocate inside

vi er likke lenger elsket har
we are no longer loved here

(Outtro)

has one of us left us without us knowing?
shall we mourn to recognize the passing?
someone somewhere weeps with me
but my tears only fall for her
and the words dying in me

4th - 9th November 2017
#30: Altered Universe